I obviously wrote this some time ago. I also clearly BS'd it pretty badly. Seems like the kind of thing I turned in 30 seconds before it was due, as opposed to one minute before.
English 111
September 6, 2007
The Lobbyists
Upon entering the lobby you are blasted by a vent of cold air. A commotion of voices from the font desk will find their way into your ear as you hear the double doors click behind you. Without actively thinking about it, you look over to the corner, perhaps a sound from the high-definition TV distracted you. Suddenly, you feel compelled to walk over and see what is playing. You are bombarded by a welcoming of “Hellos,” “What ups,” and “Hows it goin's” by the patrons of the corner. These are the Kreischer-Compton Lobbyists. While it may seem trivial, this dedicated group of individuals is drawn to the lobby by choice of entertainment, comfort, and ownership.
The most exciting place to be, from the entire Bowling Green State University campus, is this particular lobby. There is a high-definition television with a bass-boost, DVD player, and cable. There is a Macintosh computer with high speed internet. Above all else there are people there; always. There is a constant stream of passer byes and a consistent group of lobby users. It is a rare occurrence that an ESPN watcher is not utilizing the TV, and that someone isn't checking their email or facebook on the computer. Alternatively, a very interesting experience can come from just sitting and watching and listening from the lobby itself. The area here is much like a traffic intersection. People from all different areas converge on this one floor space for different reasons and some with complex plans. Many people who come to the lobby at night are there to meet someone or to find somewhere to go. By day the lobby thru traffic is there to cut corners and take a shortcut to class. But it is not uncommon to see a person or group drawn in by morning cartoons or exciting sports updates. Ultimately, the lobbyists were all once travelers just passing through. But slowly, they came together to form their group which will inevitably gain more people with time. Who can resist the lobbyists gaming activities like Balderdash, Pictionary, and Boggle? Or wonderful movies like Equilibrium, The Boondock Saints, and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Would this kind of group, and sometimes even crowd, fit into a dorm room? Would the dorms on the other side of the wall and across the hall tolerate that kind of noise? There is no question that people have more fun when they are together watching these movies.
But what is entertainment and fun without the comfort to experience it? The lounge is filled with an assortment of very, very comfy chairs and couches. In all there are nine sets of seats with a full capacity of 15 possible seats excluding the floor. All these seats and the comfortable couches would never fit in a dorm room, or even a dorm lounge. The only place for this setup is the lobby. But not only are the seating arrangements comfortable, the entire room is quite visually easy. With brick and glass as the walls, the room does not feel closed off. At night the lighting is soft and warm, during the day it's natural. Tables sit conveniently in front of the couches for books and laptops. A simple metronome clock hangs on the wall quietly keeping track of the ticking time. If one actually observes the time closely, however, they would realize that it actually slows down completely. During the day and into the evening the conversations will not strike in any weird ways; college students talking about their days and the funny things that happened and the even funnier things that should have happened. But come 1 and 2 am, you may here of deep political motivations, philosophical discussions, and maybe even conspiracy theories. Rumors suggest an oncoming short story reading.
But why the lobby; is it really that entertaining and comfortable? There are plenty of relaxing and exciting places on campus outside of the dorm building to experience people. College is a unique experience with one very detrimental downside. With all the people around who are basically strangers, it is impossible to find any space that is exclusively their's. As one's time is spent somewhere, that place will slowly become theirs just out of sheer appreciation. This is very much a desire of ownership; to have something of their own. This is said without even taking into account that logistically, it makes sense to have a public meeting area because there are people from the lobbyist group from both sides of the dorm so the lobby acts very much as a central meeting location. With the power of a group in the lobby there is no threat in anyway, forgetting the sorority meetings of course. But even in this conflict there was a certain hilarity about the entire ordeal sympathetic to the lobbyists. It is not arguable that the lobby offers a kind of recognizable ownership that the dorm room just cannot afford.
The lobby is far more than just a lobby. On par with the first Greek forums and far more productive than the U.S. Senate, this room not only literally upholds the rest of the building, but the social ideals for which the building was constructed. Everyone goes to college with social ambitions and the lobby is many ways completes some people's ability to meet those goals. The lobbyists have realized this intriguing idea and have internalized it. Because of this, they have become as much of the lobby, and maybe even more of the lobby than any table or chair in it. If you were to go to lobby and find these lobbyists and see who they are your idea of the lobby would change. I promise that if you were to return without the lobbyists there, something would be missing. For the rest of Bowling Green State University, the lobbyists are just as much an idea as they are a group of people. Founded by the elusive longing of entertainment and comfort, they have found both, and each other simultaneously finding ownership too. They are the KCD lobbyists.
Your Hero
- Fife
- You should find an "existential" reason to read this blog. Let it be whatever you want it to be. But I promise that you will not find that my facade is constructed by a socialite engineer, but a real person; a person who's life you can relate to your own.
29 September 2009
28 September 2009
Get Written Up
This semester is my third of living on campus here at Bowling Green State University. I have made many good friends here in the dorms and together we have shared countless precious moments. I will always have a great sense of nostalgia for this place and these memories. At this point I could say that these lifetime friends and heartfelt moments could not have been experienced and acquired had it not been for good lo' Bowling Green State University's ability to instill this place with such a sense of community. I resent giving the baby sitters and super visors of this facility such credit but I have no choice. Honestly, I have to give Bowling Green my congratulations in how well they maintain the structure of community that has strengthened my ties to the people I live near. If it had not been for the ridiculous rules, preposterous impositions, and insulting guidelines I'm not sure the people I share most of my time with would have anything to complain about and relate to. Just by enforcing such bogus measures upon such respectful, thoughtful, and intelligent individuals, the supervisors of this domestic complex have lost all my respect. And, while I never fully trusted in their ability to maintain true order and fair justice in a relatively balanced manor, I never suspected that such claims against me would ever be made without at least some closer and respective look to the situation at hand. Then again, relativity would assume at least some respect for who I am as a person, withholding that I am outstanding student within the Bowling Green community.
The main issue I have with this particular "educational sanction" is that within this fortress of critical thinking and analytical development that we call a university, I am basically just being forced to regurgitate rules. In doing that, the enforcers of such policies take it upon themselves to assume that, I, the student am unintelligible enough to understand rules clearly stated and conveyed both in writing and verbal all throughout the building. Now, what does that really say about the university and the students they accept? Unless of course, I am misinterpreting some aspect of such an "education sanction."
I think everyone here knows what this is really about. This is about creating a punishment that is of such severe reprimand that an offender of the rules such as myself must be more careful in the future about breaking said rules. Again, to verify, I have "allegedly" (though I'm not sure how allegedly I did anything considering I admitted guilty to the offense and there are three witnesses. . .) offended the sacred policy of quiet hours. Such a policy falls under part 6. A. of "Community Living Standards." So, the thing to ask here, is whether or not the crime actually fits the punishment. Was I breaking quiet hours out of malicious intent? Well of course Satan told me to blast house heavy dirty bass techno throughout the heavens. The idea that my actions, which so obviously were a complete accident, are punishable by a waste of my time equal to a formal meeting, walks with the RAs, plus the development of this essay are totally inappropriate in my opinion. Moreover, I am insulted to think that the baby sitters who run this complex don't trust me enough, as a twenty year old citizen and student, to have the thoughtful consideration and conscious concern for the people around me to play a major role in my actions.
I suppose the part that irks me the most is that all of this could have easily been avoided by the simply admission that indeed it was a mistake and since the circumstances that preceded it were in part because of the one time setup of my roommate speakers. To put a mistaken and minor offense of this nature in the same category of other offenses that could occur within this joke of "Community Living Standards" is preposterous and if I had any power or mind to change such a moronic system I would. With that being said, I will no longer keep you in suspended anticipation of the purpose of this essay.
Educational Sanction
Quiet hours are set in place to uphold one of the most important aspects of the community here at BGSU; respect. Respect is one of the cornerstones of life as a resident here within the dormitories. Without respect, there can be no trust or real concern for the people living within such close proximity. And while on the surface the rules may seem preposterous, superfluous, and insulting in some cases, they do actually serve the purpose of upholding the guidelines that will allow for such respect to occur and therefore lay the groundwork for community. Quite obviously the goal of community is the most sensible reason to enforce such guidelines as the end means are so sacred these regulations are justified. But, however, there are essentially three reasons for a resident to follow quiet hours on their own accord outside of following these regulations for the fear of educational sanctions (such as this one). Those reasons are for the discretion of the Resident Advisors, the respect and consideration of others in the hall, and for yourself.
It would seem that generally being an RA can be quite a task. With several friends as RA's and with following other RA's for their walks, I was able to learn more about their job and responsibilities. This was rather enlightening and brought new perspective to my previously narrow minded assessment of their position. Each night a pair of RA's must walk through both sides of the building twice. The first walk is to ensure all is well within the community. It's a good time to give friendly reminders to people about courtesy hours and quiet hours. The RA's must also check the fire extinguishers to make sure they are in working order and have not been tempered with. In addition to that, they must check for any propped doors. In doing this, they are taking a preventative measure to ensure a safer community. During my walks with the RA's, two different attitudes seemed to occur on the two different walks. During the community walk, the Resident Advisors were far more friendly and able to interact with the residents on an amiable level. Any comments made were similar to comments you might hear from two friends or neighbors lacking in authority. This was not at all awkward and interaction was definitely encouraged. But during the second walk, the attitudes were more tense and less friendly. Interactions between residents and the RA's seemed nervous and awkward. The switch occurred because this is not a walk to strengthen community, but to impose it. Rules were being enforced or strictly reminded on the basis of fair warning for possibility of penal action to be taken. Residents cowered in fear or cloaked themselves in disrespect when the RA's knocked on the door or asked residence to shut the door and keep their sound volume down. RA's are primarily students too. They conveyed to me that getting people in trouble is something they don't necessarily want to do. If they had a choice, nobody would get in trouble. But, they simultaneously have a duty to uphold as they are being compensated for the job they must perform. And in being a paramount aspect of the community itself they should be respected not just as RA's because of the higher power they possess, but also as members of the community. In that sense, it would be within any given individual's best interest to not violate the rules strictly under the condition that the RA's would rather not be placed in that awkward relationship to the resident.
Community is all about being conscious of the people around you. Nothing is more important for building community than to give as much respect and consideration to everyone. Without that, it is impossible for the other residents to feel comfortable where they live. While this building may belong to BGSU, it is the very thing that makes the residents more than just different people living in the same place. Because we share this place, it is the thing that makes this dormitory a community and a sanctuary. This is a sacred thing and it is not fair for anyone one individual or group of individuals to take that away. In playing my house-heavy-dirty-bass techno obnoxiously loud, regardless of whether or not it was by mistake, I single handedly took away other residents ability to feel comfortable where they reside. Most certainly it is unfair to expose my fellow residents to such interference and disregard. And in doing that, regardless of intent, I most certainly threatened the cornerstones of respect that are essential elements to nurture and strengthen a healthy community atmosphere.
Quiet hours force residents to generally change their routines and let their minds become more settled for rest. Residents that follow quiet hours will be forced to stop heavily involved or noisy activities upon the enforcement of quiet hours. Everyone knows that college is stressful, and sleep is never more important than during times of high stress. Quiet hours allow for the hallways to become more relaxed. For individuals who need to wake early for class, this could be crucial in allowing them to get adequate sleep for their specific needs. From a personal health context, routine is vital for the human body to regulate itself and handle stress in a more efficient way. Quiet hours most certainly facilitate that routine and help to hold that routine in place especially for the sake of circadian rhythm.
In conclusion, I feel I have more than adequately learned a lesson in respect for the community and my fellow residents. I regret the unfortunate actions that I initiated and will do my best in the future to consider with higher regard and solicitude the feelings and sensitivities of all the other residents around me. In a sense I feel glad that I was able to experience this situation in the way that I did, as I was able to get so much out of it. If I had not violated quiet hours, I may have never experienced a day in the life of an RA (or rather two walks on two nights) and gained such valuable perspective. With that being said though, I will do my very best to do a better job of assessing my actions before I make them in the hopes that don't violate the precarious conditions upon which such valuable merits for this community rest.
The main issue I have with this particular "educational sanction" is that within this fortress of critical thinking and analytical development that we call a university, I am basically just being forced to regurgitate rules. In doing that, the enforcers of such policies take it upon themselves to assume that, I, the student am unintelligible enough to understand rules clearly stated and conveyed both in writing and verbal all throughout the building. Now, what does that really say about the university and the students they accept? Unless of course, I am misinterpreting some aspect of such an "education sanction."
I think everyone here knows what this is really about. This is about creating a punishment that is of such severe reprimand that an offender of the rules such as myself must be more careful in the future about breaking said rules. Again, to verify, I have "allegedly" (though I'm not sure how allegedly I did anything considering I admitted guilty to the offense and there are three witnesses. . .) offended the sacred policy of quiet hours. Such a policy falls under part 6. A. of "Community Living Standards." So, the thing to ask here, is whether or not the crime actually fits the punishment. Was I breaking quiet hours out of malicious intent? Well of course Satan told me to blast house heavy dirty bass techno throughout the heavens. The idea that my actions, which so obviously were a complete accident, are punishable by a waste of my time equal to a formal meeting, walks with the RAs, plus the development of this essay are totally inappropriate in my opinion. Moreover, I am insulted to think that the baby sitters who run this complex don't trust me enough, as a twenty year old citizen and student, to have the thoughtful consideration and conscious concern for the people around me to play a major role in my actions.
I suppose the part that irks me the most is that all of this could have easily been avoided by the simply admission that indeed it was a mistake and since the circumstances that preceded it were in part because of the one time setup of my roommate speakers. To put a mistaken and minor offense of this nature in the same category of other offenses that could occur within this joke of "Community Living Standards" is preposterous and if I had any power or mind to change such a moronic system I would. With that being said, I will no longer keep you in suspended anticipation of the purpose of this essay.
Educational Sanction
Quiet hours are set in place to uphold one of the most important aspects of the community here at BGSU; respect. Respect is one of the cornerstones of life as a resident here within the dormitories. Without respect, there can be no trust or real concern for the people living within such close proximity. And while on the surface the rules may seem preposterous, superfluous, and insulting in some cases, they do actually serve the purpose of upholding the guidelines that will allow for such respect to occur and therefore lay the groundwork for community. Quite obviously the goal of community is the most sensible reason to enforce such guidelines as the end means are so sacred these regulations are justified. But, however, there are essentially three reasons for a resident to follow quiet hours on their own accord outside of following these regulations for the fear of educational sanctions (such as this one). Those reasons are for the discretion of the Resident Advisors, the respect and consideration of others in the hall, and for yourself.
It would seem that generally being an RA can be quite a task. With several friends as RA's and with following other RA's for their walks, I was able to learn more about their job and responsibilities. This was rather enlightening and brought new perspective to my previously narrow minded assessment of their position. Each night a pair of RA's must walk through both sides of the building twice. The first walk is to ensure all is well within the community. It's a good time to give friendly reminders to people about courtesy hours and quiet hours. The RA's must also check the fire extinguishers to make sure they are in working order and have not been tempered with. In addition to that, they must check for any propped doors. In doing this, they are taking a preventative measure to ensure a safer community. During my walks with the RA's, two different attitudes seemed to occur on the two different walks. During the community walk, the Resident Advisors were far more friendly and able to interact with the residents on an amiable level. Any comments made were similar to comments you might hear from two friends or neighbors lacking in authority. This was not at all awkward and interaction was definitely encouraged. But during the second walk, the attitudes were more tense and less friendly. Interactions between residents and the RA's seemed nervous and awkward. The switch occurred because this is not a walk to strengthen community, but to impose it. Rules were being enforced or strictly reminded on the basis of fair warning for possibility of penal action to be taken. Residents cowered in fear or cloaked themselves in disrespect when the RA's knocked on the door or asked residence to shut the door and keep their sound volume down. RA's are primarily students too. They conveyed to me that getting people in trouble is something they don't necessarily want to do. If they had a choice, nobody would get in trouble. But, they simultaneously have a duty to uphold as they are being compensated for the job they must perform. And in being a paramount aspect of the community itself they should be respected not just as RA's because of the higher power they possess, but also as members of the community. In that sense, it would be within any given individual's best interest to not violate the rules strictly under the condition that the RA's would rather not be placed in that awkward relationship to the resident.
Community is all about being conscious of the people around you. Nothing is more important for building community than to give as much respect and consideration to everyone. Without that, it is impossible for the other residents to feel comfortable where they live. While this building may belong to BGSU, it is the very thing that makes the residents more than just different people living in the same place. Because we share this place, it is the thing that makes this dormitory a community and a sanctuary. This is a sacred thing and it is not fair for anyone one individual or group of individuals to take that away. In playing my house-heavy-dirty-bass techno obnoxiously loud, regardless of whether or not it was by mistake, I single handedly took away other residents ability to feel comfortable where they reside. Most certainly it is unfair to expose my fellow residents to such interference and disregard. And in doing that, regardless of intent, I most certainly threatened the cornerstones of respect that are essential elements to nurture and strengthen a healthy community atmosphere.
Quiet hours force residents to generally change their routines and let their minds become more settled for rest. Residents that follow quiet hours will be forced to stop heavily involved or noisy activities upon the enforcement of quiet hours. Everyone knows that college is stressful, and sleep is never more important than during times of high stress. Quiet hours allow for the hallways to become more relaxed. For individuals who need to wake early for class, this could be crucial in allowing them to get adequate sleep for their specific needs. From a personal health context, routine is vital for the human body to regulate itself and handle stress in a more efficient way. Quiet hours most certainly facilitate that routine and help to hold that routine in place especially for the sake of circadian rhythm.
In conclusion, I feel I have more than adequately learned a lesson in respect for the community and my fellow residents. I regret the unfortunate actions that I initiated and will do my best in the future to consider with higher regard and solicitude the feelings and sensitivities of all the other residents around me. In a sense I feel glad that I was able to experience this situation in the way that I did, as I was able to get so much out of it. If I had not violated quiet hours, I may have never experienced a day in the life of an RA (or rather two walks on two nights) and gained such valuable perspective. With that being said though, I will do my very best to do a better job of assessing my actions before I make them in the hopes that don't violate the precarious conditions upon which such valuable merits for this community rest.
24 September 2009
18 September 2009
Confirmation.
Hmmm. I'm trying to think back to the moment when I decided I was going to go to med school.
It was a cool spring night in the week of exams. I was looking at deejay equipment around 3 or 4 am. Suddenly, I just really wanted to go to med school by day and deejay by night? I don't really know, I can't really describe why it hit me like that. But I envisioned myself as a secret psychiatrist. I mostly just wanted to help people? Who knows really. But, it was a happy thought. I considered it under severe sleep deprivation and deliriousness from stress. Then, exam week ended and I caught up on sleep. Soon after, I realized I had made a 4.0. Suddenly, it occurred to me that I could do this. So I went back to my old school on a mission.
Chemistry
Biology
Math
All things I remember doing well on in school. I remember hearing nightmare stories about chemistry. I couldn't wait to get in there. I wanted to take something difficult and interesting. I remember seeing equations on the board and knowing them instantly. My name was always in the top of the list for grades in that class. It just didn't feel that difficult.
I admit I have not taken any classes like that for a while. But I figured it would just come back. I assumed that I would just feel that way again. Hell, even if I needed to relearn it, wouldn't be that bad. Did I let my ego inflate too much? I've never considered myself anywhere near genius or brilliant but I could get it and I could do it.
Point being I just carpet bombed the shit out of a chem exam I thought I was ready for. While I was taking it, I was thinking to myself, this is not as bad as I thought it would be. I've got this under control. This is so great, I'll get away with a B on this!
Except I didn't. And I've probably put more into this class than ever before. As in, I care. I have not worked very hard at it, but I don't work hard at any classes ever. I joined a study group and actually takes notes. Those things feel like huge steps but apparently not big enough. How much do I really want to put into this class? And what about when the classes become more difficult?
Peace out medschool, it was a good plan and a fun thought. I'm just not up for it. :/
It was a cool spring night in the week of exams. I was looking at deejay equipment around 3 or 4 am. Suddenly, I just really wanted to go to med school by day and deejay by night? I don't really know, I can't really describe why it hit me like that. But I envisioned myself as a secret psychiatrist. I mostly just wanted to help people? Who knows really. But, it was a happy thought. I considered it under severe sleep deprivation and deliriousness from stress. Then, exam week ended and I caught up on sleep. Soon after, I realized I had made a 4.0. Suddenly, it occurred to me that I could do this. So I went back to my old school on a mission.
Chemistry
Biology
Math
All things I remember doing well on in school. I remember hearing nightmare stories about chemistry. I couldn't wait to get in there. I wanted to take something difficult and interesting. I remember seeing equations on the board and knowing them instantly. My name was always in the top of the list for grades in that class. It just didn't feel that difficult.
I admit I have not taken any classes like that for a while. But I figured it would just come back. I assumed that I would just feel that way again. Hell, even if I needed to relearn it, wouldn't be that bad. Did I let my ego inflate too much? I've never considered myself anywhere near genius or brilliant but I could get it and I could do it.
Point being I just carpet bombed the shit out of a chem exam I thought I was ready for. While I was taking it, I was thinking to myself, this is not as bad as I thought it would be. I've got this under control. This is so great, I'll get away with a B on this!
Except I didn't. And I've probably put more into this class than ever before. As in, I care. I have not worked very hard at it, but I don't work hard at any classes ever. I joined a study group and actually takes notes. Those things feel like huge steps but apparently not big enough. How much do I really want to put into this class? And what about when the classes become more difficult?
Peace out medschool, it was a good plan and a fun thought. I'm just not up for it. :/
15 September 2009
A Passage of Time
They just fit the look like a glove. You can spot them across campus, in class, and hear them in the halls. When I think about why it's so obvious, I can't come up with an answer. But they do stick out like a sore thumb. 9.5 out of 10 times the judgement call on them is right, furthering all evidence to their ridiculously distinct presence. I am, of course, talking about the freshman.
I have nothing against them at all. It is mostly just odd that non-freshman have the ability to smell out the freshman like the K9 drug sniffing team.
The Top 3 things to DEFINITELY look like a freshman:
1. Wear the silly lanyard that you received at orientation
2. Wear the "warrior" shirt that you got for being part of the class of 2013
3. Buy all of your books before your first class at the bookstore
Oh, while typing this I should have been NOT postponing my studying for TWO exams tomorrow. Damn.
I have nothing against them at all. It is mostly just odd that non-freshman have the ability to smell out the freshman like the K9 drug sniffing team.
The Top 3 things to DEFINITELY look like a freshman:
1. Wear the silly lanyard that you received at orientation
2. Wear the "warrior" shirt that you got for being part of the class of 2013
3. Buy all of your books before your first class at the bookstore
Oh, while typing this I should have been NOT postponing my studying for TWO exams tomorrow. Damn.
07 September 2009
N/A = Not Attentive
Hmmm, I shouldn't be typing anything other than the paper that is due tomorrow that I have yet to start. But, yes, defiantly (defiant oh whom, you ask? --who am I kidding, you're not really asking. . .) I am putting this paper off even further into the night. I do this to keep a personal and public reputation.
The personal reputation is this. I type paper's when I am exhausted, in the middle of the night/beginning of the morning. I start my papers with lots of drugs; a brilliant combination of adrenaline and caffeine. The adrenaline is from stress induced panic attacks. The caffeine is from cheap crappy coffee and green tea. I pride myself on the ability to bullshit papers without even thinking about them. Then, after the rush of the stimulants passes my body, I find myself barely functioning, yet, pressing on (the keys that is) into the next day in order to finish spreading the manure evenly through the pages. The next day, I wake to find a beautifully crafted paper sitting on the desktop of my computer, ready to be spell checked and printed. Though I might not remember exactly what I typed, I usually like the way it sounds.
My public reputation for not typing papers is fairly outstanding as well. In general people are surprised when I open up a blank word document before 1am to get started. There are also a few notorious stories in which (my apologies for being so vain here) I have stayed up until the sunrise just bitching to everyone around me about the paper I had to write itself, rather than spending less time just writing the paper and getting it over with. But who are we really kidding? We all know it's not about the paper, it's about how the paper is written; how well it asks the good questions and makes the astute critiques. So, generally I find myself getting excited about funny things to put in the paper and pushing the ridiculousness of the topics to their extremes. But, my dear reader, tonight, this paper is a whole different beast.
It is, I'm afraid something I almost dare not even say. Yes, it is a "Critique Essay." Really? I want to meet the assholes here who say that this is a good idea. I want to speak to the people who assume that by reading an essay by another, I gain ability to assess that paper, by writing a critique of it. Sure, sure the heads of the english department are all academic head honchos who probably wear their accolades and academic awards like war medals for all the political ass kissing - - I mean intellectual pioneering they have done.
Felt good to get all that out there, time to down this coffee and get this shit done.
Oh AND I ALMOST FORGOT. Apparently, over this just newly passed Labor Day Weekend, there were not ONE but TWO online math assignments due. . . Who is the dumbass who didn't check the calendar for that one? Two!? Is that entirely necessary!? Time to stop acting like the freshman I wish I was and start acting like the junior my tuition says I should be. . .
The personal reputation is this. I type paper's when I am exhausted, in the middle of the night/beginning of the morning. I start my papers with lots of drugs; a brilliant combination of adrenaline and caffeine. The adrenaline is from stress induced panic attacks. The caffeine is from cheap crappy coffee and green tea. I pride myself on the ability to bullshit papers without even thinking about them. Then, after the rush of the stimulants passes my body, I find myself barely functioning, yet, pressing on (the keys that is) into the next day in order to finish spreading the manure evenly through the pages. The next day, I wake to find a beautifully crafted paper sitting on the desktop of my computer, ready to be spell checked and printed. Though I might not remember exactly what I typed, I usually like the way it sounds.
My public reputation for not typing papers is fairly outstanding as well. In general people are surprised when I open up a blank word document before 1am to get started. There are also a few notorious stories in which (my apologies for being so vain here) I have stayed up until the sunrise just bitching to everyone around me about the paper I had to write itself, rather than spending less time just writing the paper and getting it over with. But who are we really kidding? We all know it's not about the paper, it's about how the paper is written; how well it asks the good questions and makes the astute critiques. So, generally I find myself getting excited about funny things to put in the paper and pushing the ridiculousness of the topics to their extremes. But, my dear reader, tonight, this paper is a whole different beast.
It is, I'm afraid something I almost dare not even say. Yes, it is a "Critique Essay." Really? I want to meet the assholes here who say that this is a good idea. I want to speak to the people who assume that by reading an essay by another, I gain ability to assess that paper, by writing a critique of it. Sure, sure the heads of the english department are all academic head honchos who probably wear their accolades and academic awards like war medals for all the political ass kissing - - I mean intellectual pioneering they have done.
Felt good to get all that out there, time to down this coffee and get this shit done.
Oh AND I ALMOST FORGOT. Apparently, over this just newly passed Labor Day Weekend, there were not ONE but TWO online math assignments due. . . Who is the dumbass who didn't check the calendar for that one? Two!? Is that entirely necessary!? Time to stop acting like the freshman I wish I was and start acting like the junior my tuition says I should be. . .
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